I Guess I Should Write

I probably should starting again. Just about things I've seen and learnt over the past couple of years. It's a good release and it'll be a nice outlet to put some thoughts into paper. Now if only I had a penny for my thoughts.. :D

Its Been Awhile

It's been awhile 
Since I could 
Hold my head up high 
And it's been awhile 
Since I first saw you 
And it's been awhile 
Since I could stand 
On my own two feet again 
And it's been awhile 
Since I could call you 
And all the things I can't remember 
As ****ed up as it all may seem 
The consequences that are rendered 
I stretch myself beyond my means 

And it's been awhile 
Since I could say 
That I wasn't addicted 
It's been awhile 
Since I could say 
I loved myself as well 
And it's been awhile 
Since I've gone and 
****ed things up 
Just like I always do 
And it's been awhile 
But all that **** 
Seems to disappear 
When I'm with you 

And everything I can remember 
As ****ed up as it all may seem 
The consequences that I've rendered 
Have gone and ****ed things up again 

Why must I feel this way? 
Just make this go away 
Just one more peaceful day 

It's been awhile 
Since I couldn't 
Look at myself straight 
And it's been awhile 
Since I said, "I'm sorry" 
And it's been awhile 
Since I've seen the way 
The candles light your face 
And it's been awhile 
But I can still remember 
Just the way you taste 

And everything I can remember 
As ****ed up 
As it all may seem to be 
I know it's me 
I cannot blame this on my father 
He did the best he could for me 

It's been awhile 
Since I couldn't 
Hold my head up high 
And it's been awhile 
Since I said, "I'm sorry" 

Kenny Rogers - The Gambler

On a warm summer's evenin' on a train bound for nowhere,
I met up with the gambler; we were both too tired to sleep.
So we took turns a starin' out the window at the darkness
'Til boredom overtook us, and he began to speak.

He said, "Son, I've made my life out of readin' people's faces,
And knowin' what their cards were by the way they held their eyes.
So if you don't mind my sayin', I can see you're out of aces.
For a taste of your whiskey I'll give you some advice."

So I handed him my bottle and he drank down my last swallow.
Then he bummed a cigarette and asked me for a light.
And the night got deathly quiet, and his face lost all expression.
Said, "If you're gonna play the game, boy, ya gotta learn to play it right.

You got to know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em,
Know when to walk away and know when to run.
You never count your money when you're sittin' at the table.
There'll be time enough for countin' when the dealin's done.

"Now Ev'ry gambler knows that the secret to survivin'
Is knowin' what to throw away and knowing what to keep.
'Cause ev'ry hand's a winner and ev'ry hand's a loser,
And the best that you can hope for is to die in your sleep."

So when he'd finished speakin', he turned back towards the window,
Crushed out his cigarette and faded off to sleep.
And somewhere in the darkness the gambler, he broke even.
But in his final words I found an ace that I could keep.

You got to know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em,
Know when to walk away and know when to run.
You never count your money when you're sittin' at the table.
There'll be time enough for countin' when the dealin's done.

Born Free

Born free, as free as the wind blows 
As free as the grass grows 
Born free to follow your heart 

Live free, and beauty surrounds you 
The world still astounds you 
Each time you look at a star 

Stay free, where no walls divide you 
You're free as a roaring tide 
So there's no need to hide 

Born free, and life is worth living 
But only worth living 

Cause you're born free                                        

Stone Sour - Imperfect

Some things are better off forgotten
We bury them in places that we really only visit by ourselves
Oh you were a version like no other
Oh they never tell you what to do when all you see is gone
What's the sense in anything when what they say is wrong?

Oh what do you want to hear?
Do you know how many times
I tore myself apart cuz you're not here?
Oh why do you want to know?
Does it make you feel alive?
I had to die to finally let you go

Stop me... I find myself believing
A story gets rewritten so a blasphemy's permitted once again
Oh and you were so perfectly imperfect
Oh they never tell you what to do when all you have are lies
What's the sense in anything? It's just one more goodbye

Oh what do you want to hear?
Do you know how many times
I tore myself apart cuz you're not here?
Oh why do you want to know?
Does it make you feel alive?
I had to die to finally let you go

Oh what do you want to hear?
Do you know how many times
I tore myself apart cuz you're not here?
Oh why do you want to know?
Does it make you feel alive?
I had to die to finally let you go

Live Forever

Maybe, I don't really want to know
How your garden grows
'Coz I just want to fly

Lately, did you ever feel the pain
In the morning rain
As it soaks you to the bone

Maybe I just want to fly
I want to live I don't want to die
Maybe I just want to breath
Maybe I just don't believe
Maybe you're the same as me
We see things they'll never see
You and I are gonna live forever

Maybe, I don't really want to know
How your garden grows
'Coz I just want to fly

Lately, did you ever feel the pain
In the morning rain
As it soaks you to the bone

Maybe I will never be
All the things that I want to be
But now is not the time to cry
Now's the time to find out why
I think you're the same as me
We see things they'll never see
You and I are gonna live forever
We're gonna live forever
Gonna live forever
Live forever
Forever

People Management, Kiran Desai & John Petrucci???

Hey, next time you want someone to do something for you, show 'em whats in it for them. 'Coz, quite frankly, if they don't stand to gain something from it, its highly unlikely that they'll bother, unless of course, they're fucking stupid!!!!! Use this wherever you can, it'll make life and people a lot easier for you. And go read The Inheritance Of Loss. Kiran Desai is a terrific, terrific writer. The characters in that book are some of the best that i've ever come across.
This blog shall be deleted soon, 'coz guitaring is all i care about right now.
And if you are into guitaring, watch this video of Mr.John Petrucci playing Glasgow kiss, this guy's technique is the best man, the best.

The Silver Lining

My guitar. Ibanez RG 270DX. I've been playing it all week for like 8 hrs daily. In addition, its also the only thing that i am actually a little good at. So ya, it does deserve a mention taking into account the aforementioned line & the fact that i keep playing it like, all the time. Besides, guitar's what folks in college always associate me with.
Really cant figure out why i love playing it so much though. But once i do start playing, just cant stop. Guess its something which comes naturally. Strange thing, this music is. But beautiful too.

Every dark cloud has a silver lining they say, looks like i've found mine.

My First Fortune Cookie

Got my first fortune cookie today. Here's what it says ::

For Better Luck, wait until winter.

Better luck eh?? Well, for starters, I'm not much of a believer in luck anyways. 'Coz for the major part of my life, luck really hasn't played a pivotal role in it as such. The leitmotif of my 19 years of existence has generally been :: As you sow, so you reap. Been getting what I've deserved on almost all occasions. There is the occasional godsend when I'd least be expecting it but, as always, nullified courtesy some misfortune at the most inopportune moment. Both, "good luck" & "bad luck" are perpetually in sync with each other, consistently crossing each other out.
The Chinese are smart people yes, but paying heed to those 6 words wont assist me much with whats to come till winter, be it good, bad or ugly. And, in truth, my "luck" graph has shown quite an ascension in the past 2 weeks. If its to get better with the arrival of winter, life, is good. :D

But wait a minute!!! Mumbai doesn't have much of a winter!!!(2 weeks at most).....Now how encouraging is that??!!....damned cookie.... :(

Anyone of you guys got one of these???...what did it say???

Insomnia

Sleepless i lie

As the energy it courses, through my every vein

Bloodshot are my eyes

As i sleepwalk all day

aaaa

The Sandman he comes

But never to my room

Content instead, to let me rot

In the dark night's gloom

ssss

Tossing and turning

The numbers i count

Only but to loose

As i find there's no way out

Wanna Catch Man-eater??? Use Cellphone

Read about this in The Times Of India a couple o days back. Couldn't help but smile. It Happens only in India they say, so true.........

A ringtone to catch a man-eater ::
Forest officials in Samba village in the Mahuva taluka of Surat district, who were trying to catch a leopard that had killed a boy from the village on Friday, used a mobile phone with a ringtone that sounded like a rooster to lure the beast into a trap.
The ringtone was a backup just in case the petrified live rooster in the trap decided to clamp up.
The technique was simple. When the officials in pursuit of their elusive killer were sure that the leopard was in the vicinity of the trap, they dialled the 'bait' phone and kept their fingers crossed, hoping that the sound of the rooster would persuade the leopard to head towards the cage.
If this sounds like a hare-brained scheme, it's time for a rethink - officials were successful not so long ago in trapping a man-eating leopard by using this technique in a nearby village.
Three months ago when farmers sighted a leopard in the sugarcane fields in Kathia village, forest officials decided to capture and release the animal somewhere near Ukai. But it turned to be a Herculean task as the chicken refused to squawk for hours and the leopard stayed away.
"It was then that a funny idea struck me. I have a mobile ring tone that sounds like a rooster's cry. I placed my cell inside the cage along with the live rooster and between midnight to 4am when the chances of a leopard coming out for its kill are high, we started calling my cell from another cellphone. To our surprise the trick worked and the leopard fell into the trap," said forest officer Satish Purohit.

Moral Of The Story ::
Don't hesitate to try out ideas that seem stupid at first. 'Coz sometimes, they just might work!!!!..... :D

Boredom

Yes, boredom. No matter how hard one tries, there seems to be no escape from it. Standing in lines, studying for that one mundane subject, there seems to no end to the no of boring things one has to do everyday. But the boredom that I've written about in my previous posts doesn't belong in the aforementioned. Its the type that people suffer from when they're let go, when they're set free, and given complete responsibility for their time and actions. Within a week or less, you'll hear that oft repeated phrase "Man, i'm so bored!!!!!! There's nothing to do". (A phrase which, i too can be accused of using, tho, at a frequency far lesser than the majority). They'll sit around all day doing nothing and simply ponder over the question "What do i do now??". A question, to which they find no answer or are too lazy to even try finding one and are content with allowing themselves to rot. Thing is, i find this to be both dangerous and a crime. Lucky for us they don't jail us for it. And the danger?? Try - "An idle mind is the devil's workshop??" How true that is....
You may call me blunt, but like it or not, i do have a point here. How do you overcome this illness?? That's for you to figure. Can't help you there. Although, if y'all know me, you may have noticed that i have made some progress in this direction, and found things to keep myself busy with. So maybe i can. But lets leave that for later.

Take Time..........

Take time for work, it is the price of success.
Take time to think, it is the source of power.
Take time to play, it is the secret of youth.
Take time to read, it is the fountain of wisdom.
Take time to be friendly, it is the road to happiness.
Take time to dream, it's hitching your wagon to a star.
Take time to love, it is the highest joy of life.
Take time to laugh, it is the music of the soul.

Love & Mercy - Michka Assayas

Some morning, a handful of people board a commuter train, carrying bags filled with charge, all stuffed with bolts and nails. I am refusing to analyze it. Try putting yourself inside the head of a madman, and pretty soon you'll find yourself feeling like one too. Moreover, that is exactly the aim of those delirious political and religious sects: carrying the world into a collective madness at the end of which, of course, truth will prevail, a truth that only its followers detain.
In a magazine called Courier International, i have just read about the story of Zarema, a twenty-three-year-old from Chechnya. Armed with an explosive belt, she renounced, just at the last minute, to smash herself to pieces in a pub in Moscow, and turned herself in to the police. A Russian journalist got the opportunity to interview her in her cell. There she told him her appalling life story. Her mother abandons her while she is a ten-month-old baby. Then her father gets murdered on a building site in Siberia. It doesn't sound like a great start in life. It isn't. Raised by her grandparents, she is forced into marrying "according to our old customs", as she puts it, some local dealer. Pretty soon, the man gets shot by a competing gang. At that time, she is expecting his baby. For want of money, she is not able to raise her baby daughter by herself. So out of hand the husband's clan places the baby in another family. Zarema is accordingly parted from her child and sent back to her grandparents' place. They live at the far end of the country. There, she goes out of her mind with grief. So what does she do? She robs the family jewels, which she proceeds to sell to the market, so as to board a plane and to abduct her daughter. But her aunts recapture her just as she is about to do that. They humiliate her and strike her repeatedly, because she has become the disgrace of the family.
So Zarema sees only one solution. To become at last a "decent person"--I'm quoting her words here--she thinks she has to sacrifice herself for Allah and Jihad, so her shame gets washed away and her debt paid off, since the rebels give away a thousand dollars to a martyr's family. At the rebels' hideout, she encounters other suicide applicants. One of them, a nineteen-year-old girl, blows herself up during an open-air rock concert in Moscow: fourteen dead. Zarema sees the bodies on television. Something clicks in her head. Above all, she feels compassion for the young girl who died in the operation, the one whom she saw everyday---her companion. "She is the one that i pitied the most", she says. So her eyes open and she gives up the madness. You can say a kind of miracle happened....
Love and mercy: those words do not only make sense for the survivors. In order to fight effectively against the terrorist insanity, perhaps they're more than the infiltration of cells, the shelling of villages and the so-called war on terror. Because the nature of that terror is moral and religious as much as it is political, the answer sometimes has to be of the same nature. In one case, love and mercy simply worked...................

Hilarious!!!!!!

You'll dig this vid, especially if your familiar with the characters.

Pink Floyd - High Hopes

What a Song!!!!! Solo, lyrics, everything...Perfecto!!!!!

Beyond the horizon of the place we lived when we were young
In a world of magnets and miracles
Our thoughts strayed constantly and without boundary
The ringing of the division bell had begun
Along the long road and on down the causeway
Do they still meet there by the cut
There was a ragged man that followed in our footsteps
Running before time took our dreams away
Leaving the myriad small creatures trying to tie us to the ground
To a life consumed by slow decay

The grass was greener
The light was brighter
With friends surrounded
The nights of wonder

Looking beyond the embers of bridges glowing behind us
To a glimpse of how green it was on the other side
Steps taken forwards but sleepwalking back again
Dragged by the force of some inner tide
At a higher altitude with flag unfurled
We reached the dizzy heights of that dreamed of world

Encumbered forever by desire and ambition
There's a hunger still unsatisfied
Our weary eyes still stray to the horizon
Go down this road we've been so many times

The grass was greener
The light was brighter
The taste was sweeter
The nights of wonder
With friends surrounded
The dawn mist glowing
The water flowing
The endless river

Forever and ever

Dont Think Too Much!!!

For those of you who think and analyze everything to the very last detail, mull over this for a moment, isn't this habit of yours is more of a hindrance than a help?? How many instances have there been when all that thinking and evaluation really amounted to little or nothing in the end, and the solution was a six letter word, viz.......................ACTION!!!!
I certainly will testify to that, I've found instinct and good 'ol hardwork to be much better alllies than all the calculated planning that many of us employ. I dunno, there seems to be some inherent built-in mechanism within us, which, if allowed to go to work, always, without flaw and without delay, finds the best ways and means to overcome that which is holding and hindering us. Besides that, its fun and there ain't much stress via this route either. So what if you make a mistake??!! Simply learn from it and move on.
Too many of us spend too much time worrying about every problem that'll come our way and work ourselves to death trying to get past 'em. We spend nights without slumber, mulling over our peers, friends or parents' reaction. End result, your folks don't give a rip about it, and you've got yourself some very ugly dark circles. Worth it?? Certainly not. Next time, screw the critics, go ahead and do your thing anyways.
And most of these "problems" exist only in our mind, but we spent so much time with them that by the time opportunity does come knocking, we are too depleted to open the door. Try this instead, work your way through the maze without any surmise and estimate of what is to come, and when your way is thwarted, relax, stay level-headed, don't let your fears get the better of you, and allow the your mind to work through each problem ONE AT A TIME, ie. go to the next hurdle only after you've jumped over the one in front of ya. Thats how an athlete goes about winning a race i think. Try usin this analogy the next time you knot yourself up with problems. Peace.....

Switchfoot - Awakening

My Alt-Rock Favorites. Better than a lotta the junk thats out there. Honest music and Lyrics, which is a rarity these days. And all Rock N' Roll aint "EVIL" as some of you have may have pointed out. Yes there is a lotta crap that has gone down with the music, but the genre has its positve's too, and switchfoot certainly is one of them.

Words In Colour

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaForgotten, But Not Gone

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaTranquil Slumber

Bored?? Try Creativity

Bored of all the goings-on in college, at work, on just life in general. Repulsed at even the sight of those books?? Well, looks like you need a change. For me, that change is creativity. Seriously, try it. Sure enough, it'll rid you of the lethargy and rust that has sunk in from the monotony, and enliven you with new found vigour and enthusiasm. A channel, relieving us of all that has crept in from the rote donkey work, that's what creativity does best. All the frustration, the stress and the weariness starts seeping outta ya, and voila!!! your back. The Brain's got the fuel it needed and recompenses us handsomely, suddenly, our hearts are light and our shortcomings, trivial.
What is it, that triggers your muse??? Well, that is for you to ponder. Try something lucid and simple like reading, playing an instrument, writing, painting, poetry, sudoku, to name just a few. So what if you ain't good at it, who cares??!! You're the benefactor here, its you we're talking about. Take my case for instance. I know I'm not good at writing. But hell who cares??!! Suffice to say that it provides me with a channel to vent my frustration, angst & lighten my load in general, which is a must considering the environment i live in (viz. The Jail). Besides, i am more than willing to relieve myself in this manner, rather than in some way which'll cause harm to both others and to me. And, with time, you never know, i might actually improve!!! Sounds good to me. So go ahead, give creativity a shot.



P.S - This article is based on personal experience and there is no guarantee that the techniques suggested will work for everybody. ( I'm not kidding ).