Eldrich Rebello :: About A Fish

Well, we've all seen him college, with his geeky glasses and egg-shaped head. He talks and writes a lot about peers (Batman in particular) but little is known bout him. Some think he's gay, some say martian,some think he's plain weird, few folks also think he's a nice chap (?????!!!!!!!!!). Well a couple o' days back he gave me a deep and interesting insight about himself. Apparently, our man Elda, thinks only about four things:

1) To make bombs of varying intensities and then jus watch em explode. Apparently the noise,smoke & lights exalt him to the nth degree.
2)To Catch fish and slay em.
3)To see Penguins dance.
4)He also has a lot of interest in sound and music and wishes to create stimulating music for the penguins to enhance their moves.

These four goals are all related to each other and he has carefully carved out a plan to accomplish these in perfect sequence. So here goes:
Elda, wid his expertise in bomb making shall create bombs tht emit extremely high frequency ultrasonic waves. These shall be placed along the circumference of a pond full of fish. Now, when bombs explode, fishys come to centre of river where Elda lies in wait. With tht fishing net he borrowed from Batman Elda catch fish. But on account of batman going broke every couple of days, the net he gives Elda is a cheap and 3rd rate one. Consequently more than half the fish escape and Elda manages to catch only 10-15. Now, Elda, with Batman's Swiss knife (its actually a second-hand made in Saki-naka) slays the fish and has fulfilled his second wish. Following this,Eldrich slogs his butt off, gets into Berklee, masters the concepts of sound and music and after two yrs of hardwork comes up with his very own f-tunes (designed specifically to enhance penguin dancing moves). Then, with the money he made thru his stinkin blog, he just about manages to buy a lousy discman and hitches a ride to the Antarctic. There, braving the cold he ventures deep into the iceland and finally, has captured a dozen penguins. Then, the final phase begins. For Elda, its all or nothin now. Coz its on this icy wasteland that his very purpose for existence is to be decided. Will he die another unknown ? or is he to be immortalised forever? As his trembling hand puts the CD in the player, his whole life flashes in front of him. From the time the first and last strand of hair grew on his head to the day when he joined agnels to when he screwed himself, everything just zips past him like a fast-forwarded trailer. For a second he feels like he's a in a cheap Bollywood rip-off. But then, the cold Antarctic chill brings him back to reality. He places the phones on the 1st penguin, nothing. 2nd one, again nothing. 3rd - nothing. 4th,5th,6th,7th,8th,9th,10th, nothing, nothing, NOTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! No.11wobbles ahead. As the music starts playing, the penguin takes one step, then another one. Its working!!!!!!! Eldrich cant believe it.............But wait, Mr. Penguin suddenly .........(CANT GO BEYOND THIS POINT, SO PLZ GIMME ENDINGS, PLZ LEAVE EM AS COMMENTS, AND DONT REMAIN ANONYMOUS!!! BTW THIS STORY IS NON-FICTION)